I'm grateful for: time with my 6yo; finishing my jigsaw puzzle (I hope); a better attitude than I had earlier

Back in my 'safe' diary, and I have nothing controversial to write about, I don't think. I was mulling about things arab, and some of the different things that are in their world view from that of most of the world I am familiar with - the U.S., Europe, Israel. But, it's not that important. There's a lot of really stupid people out there, is all.

Now, obviously I'm not talking about any of my readers. All y'all must have some extraordinary intelligence and good sense if you are here reading my diary. I wouldn't have it otherwise. *grin*

Or something like that.

Mind you, I don't think someone is stupid just because they disagree with me. LOTS of people disagree with me. They can't all be stupid (I think ...) ;-) But deliberate and willful denial of facts, especially in order to hang on to a viewpoint which is distinctly suicidal - that is, not promoting one's longer-term survival. Well, I think that is stupid.

Case in point: a bunch of rabbis who showed up at a solidarity march in Washington against Israel. You don't have to like Israel, or think she is on the right side of things, to recognize that almost everyone in Lebanon would as soon kill you as look at you. Whether in Hizbullah or not.

You don't need to be a rocket scientist to recognize that an act of aggression across an international border requires a response, OR that citizens committing such an act of aggression are the responsibility of their own country, which is to be held accountable for their actions.

If a trained group of paramilitary Jews, not a part of the Israeli army, crossed the border into Lebanon, shot up an army station, killed a bunch of Lebanese soldiers and kidnapped some others, the world, including those rabbis, would be monumentally quick to condemn all of Israel, and for many, Jews everywhere. And any retribution taken by the Lebanese would be hailed as fully justified. Just ask Kofi Annon.

So, what were those rabbis doing there? Are they self-hating Jews? Are the just STUPID? Me, I think it's option 'B.'

The problem you see isn't anything other than that Israel has the temerity to Fight Back. As poor, helpless victims the world is more than willing to 'support' us and 'help' us as long as we don't make any waves, rock any boats, or remind the world at any difficult or uncomfortable times of our very existence. As a nation which has a right to - and does - defend itself against acts of aggression by hostile neighbours, not to mention hostile citizens of the country itself, we are only fit to be condemned like a dog which has forgotten it's place, and tried to sit at the table like people.

Fuggetaboutit. My life is too full and happy to be bothered for very long, really. I just need to stop reading all those people who are STUPID.

You know what? Thought passing through my head and I write them here, not knowing if they are going to make any sense or not once typed... I am basically on my own side. I am a Jew, an Israeli. I am on the side of the Jews and the Israelis. On the side of the U.S., too, if it comes to that and as long as there is no conflict of interest, which so far there really hasn't been. There is a lady I read who is married to a Lebanese man. And she stays mostly out of the politics, but is clearly and wholely on the side of the Lebanese, regardless of who started it or who is responsible. I have no problem with that.

I saw a photo of a dead Lebanese boy being pulled from the rubble of a building, and of course it makes me sad. It is a tragic thing. But, you know what? Better a dozen of theirs dead than one of mine. Not P.C. enough for some, and that's just too bad. It's reality. It's about being a survivor. You have to be on your own side, first.

THAT's what bothers me about all this. Those rabbis, and in fact most Americans, to people like Hizbullah are the enemy, to be killed, lives destroyed at any opportunity. Yet these people, these rabbis, seemingly most Americans, not to mention an awful LOT of Europeans, don't seem to be on their own side. It's not that you don't feel huge sadness at the death and destruction to BOTH sides, but you support your own side, first.

And as long as arab muslims are blowing people up in Israel, in the U.S., in Europe, in fact around the world, then theirs is not our side. We are on the same side if only people had the sense to see it.

It's like a wounded two-year-old with an uzi. You want to help the child, but you have to disarm her first. No one would argue with this premise. Especially if she's already managed to shoot the gun, injuring or killing people.

I do feel sorry for the Lebanese who are suffering. But they have to stop shooting at us - heck, I won't even insist they disarm as long as we know they won't shoot at us - before I can worry about anything buy my side - my survival.

I am a survivor. So far, Israel is a survivor. Although sometimes the way we carry on I'm not sure that we are all on our own side. Yeah, we have plenty of STUPID people here, too.

Did anyone hear that the defense minister, as soon as he heard about the kidnapping of Gilad Shalit, rushed right down to the stock exchange and sold all of his stock in Israeli companies? Now THAT is definitely the kind of man I want on my side. Oy.

I really just wanted to write about little, family things. Maybe I should start a different entry, this one is long enough, but as long as I am here, I guess I'll carry on.

Jessica phoned yesterday. She was really upset with Chris. I can't blame her. He is being the most irresponsible little shit. Anyway, she said she wanted a shoulder to cry on, but I think I may have done more than that. I asked before I offered suggestions, to make sure she was okay with it. And I may have saved the day.

She had talked/thought herself into a corner in which: a) she couldn't continue to live with Chris as he is; and b) she couldn't bear the thought of kicking him out, so c)she was pretty well suffering, frustrated and miserable.

I offered to reframe it for her. I agreed that she couldn't continue the way things have been with Chris. And I pointed out that she couldn't change Chris, as she'd found out the hard way. Which leaves ... changing herself.

I said instead of trying to make him act responsible, just start from the premise that he is utterly irresponsible. REMIND him fifteen times a day, if necessary, about trash that needs to be taken out. DON'T ask him to sit up with the baby and trust him to do the job. The last time he said he would, instead of getting up to feed the baby when Zach was hungry, Chris just kept pushing a plug - a pacifier into his mouth. And then complained the next day about how he hadn't been able to get any sleep. Instead, take it for granted that you can't rely on him to care for the baby and make other arrangements.

If he doesn't like being treated this way, or if he gets resentful or angry, remind him that you are merely behaving appropriately for the circumstances of living with someone who can't be trusted to do what he says he will do. The point is, instead of Jessica being frustrated and hurt and upset, if anyone is going to feel bad, it should be Chris. He's the one whose not doing what he says he will, and taking her for granted, and neglecting the children. So, let him be the one to feel bad if anyone is.

There will be more to this, unquestionably. For instance, Chris spends almost all of his time moping around the house, unhappy, and unwilling to be made happy by anything or anyone around him. That will require possibly some special coaching - because it is not easy to just let someone you live with and care about be miserable, even if it is their choice to be that miserable.

Anyway, the key point was not to try and make Chris change, and not to let him ruin your life either. And you do that by acting as if he is exactly the person he acts like - not the person you want him to be, or wish he could be, or he says he is, or you (or he) think he should be. Why is that so hard? I don't know, but it is.

It was delightful to talk to Jessica, and when we had to get off the phone suddenly, I was able to call back and just have a happy chat about Abigail, and babies, and life. It was all pretty cool.

John and I watched Click last night. It's a new (to us) Adam Sandler movie. Not a typical Adam Sandler movie, I think. It was very good. Also, an object lesson. Christopher Lloyd played a very non-typical role for him, too. Lots of fun. I am glad, though, that I didn't pay to watch it in the movie theatre. It wasn't THAT good.

I was in Kfar Saba (or maybe Ra'anana) the other day, someplace that has movie rentals, and thinking how much cheaper it would be, and nicer, to be able to rent movies instead of having to either buy them or see them in the theatre. That is probably the biggest problem we have regarding movies. Why we buy so many bootlegs (can't afford to buy all those movies properly - and wouldn't want to if we are just checking something out to see if we like it). So, what I want is a movie rental place within reasonable range. That's all. Oh, and not to be stuck in this house for another winter. Please, Hashem.

Something I ran into yesterday leads me to believe that the third Pirates of the Caribbean movie has opened in the states. Has it? If so, it's grossly unfair. Very unfair for people to be making jokes about it and so on when it hasn't made it here yet at all. And we are SO looking forward to seeing it. I hope it makes good on the promise of the first two.

I can't think what else there is. There was a lot I wanted to write about, but, oh, this is so long already. I will stop now. And probably waste some time playing Kingdom of Loathing, or else work on reading my book Around the World Submerged. I'm actually making some progress in it, but it looks like it may be the only book I finish this month. *sigh*

Eliyahu is up and chatting at me about his latke shooter. Don't ask.

I give up, I can't hear myself think. :-)

I'm listening to (artist) Lahakat A'Yalon: Kum veHithalech ba'Aretz (Get Up and Walk in the Land - or something like that)

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06