I'm grateful for: somehow having enough; a 'normal' evening at home; my cats Joyce and Willow, who are flanking me on the sofa and purring.

I kind of don't want to write anything here, but that's because I'm frazzled and stressed and this move will never be finished, and it's all just too damn hard! I hate writing about shit like that.

So anyway. Today there was a Hannukah party on the moshav, for the younger kids. Simcha and Eliyahu went, but Eliyahu left, it was too long and boring for him. Simcha seems to have had a great time, and made a friend into the bargain. There was a woman who (I think?) is a hobby archeologist, who explained a bit to the kids about making oil and oil lamps and all kinds of nifty stuff like that. Then they got to try pressing oil from some olives that were brought for the purpose, and they worked with some clay - Simcha made me a little stand for my 'snake ball,' a tchotchke I've had for years - and painting some clay things that were brought for the purpose.

We were supposed to go to the zoo today, but instead we went shopping. Long story, but in the end I'm sure it was the right choice. We needed food. Had some seriously bad news today. Really don't want to go into it, it basically involves having a significant chunk of money taken (theft) and, well, that's enough about that.

John arranged to pay the electric bill for the old house on a credit card, which puts our bank account so far into the minus (pronounced 'mee-noose') I can't even think about it. And, well buying food is stressful, but one must eat. We also splurged on some small gifts for the three youngest kids.

Simcha got beads and a bead case from a wonderful bead store in Ashkelon at hatakhana hareckevet (the train station). Zechy got his first P.G. Wodehouse book. It's not the first one, but it was the only one in the English language section of the Tsomet Sfarim - Book Crossing. Eliyahu got some toy tools, which is his favourite thing in the whole world, bar none, at the moment.

Oh, we also made it to the shuk in Netivot for the first time! It was fun. It's a good shuk for me, not too big, but with a little bit of just about everything. No furniture, but that's fine, really. Oh, and no baked goods. Such is life. We picked up a lot of fresh produce, and a pair of slippers for Eliyahu which he might actually wear. They are red (his favourite colour), with dog faces and floppy ears. Incredibly cute. Unfortunately Balta thinks they are designed for her to play with. I trust we'll get it all sorted out soon enough.

We also found radishes! Which might not be exciting to most people, but they are the first radishes I've seen. I'm looking forward to figuring out how to use them best.

Tonight was, I think, the first night we had absolutely nothing extra on. John worked from home a bit, and made spaghetti, and served the vegetable-beet soup I made last night. The soup was good, but a bit spicier and a bit less sweet than I had hoped. The spicier - my fault. I knew it was too much pepper when it went in.

I tried to get some work done on the computer, but mostly just played games and got a bit caught up with the news. Israel isn't like any other place in the world, everyone here compulsively listens to or checks on the news all day long every day. Okay, maybe not quite everybody, but enough people so you think of it as everybody. People go on vacation and they come back and comment how they didn't look at the news but once a day.

Nothing really special in today's news - another couple of kassam rockets hit south of Ashkelon (people in Sderot breathe a sigh of relief). The Fatah-Hamas fighting. An Israeli car firebombed, four soldiers injured driving over a roadside bomb (in a protected jeep). A strike threatened because civil servents haven't been paid for four months. A bit of this and that from the usual mouthpieces, twelve different analyses of the situation in Azza and Yesha (Gaza and Judea and Samaria), and a weather report. Oh, yes, we get them too. Even though for most of the year it tells you nothing new - hot, sunny, dry. This time of year all anyone wants to know is it going to rain, and when. We're in a draught situation here - yes, I know, a draught in a desert - with the winter rains not having started yet. Almost a month late. Worrying but not critical. Yet.

It's supposed to start raining on Thursday of Friday. I hope we get the rain, but I shudder at the thought of colder temperatures that come with the rain.

Someone, Wyndspirit I think, was talking about a nice day with temps being around forty. When temps go down to 40F around here, we all freeze. That's because these houses are basically unheated blocks of concrete. It is often warmer outside than in. Having a cold home is no fun. Still, it's better than the old house, much. When we turn on the heater in the salon, we actually feel it getting warmer.

The floors are way too cold though. Nothing we can do about that. We have to wear shoes or sandals or slippers. I am wearing some topsiders with socks in (outrageous, I know) and my feet can still feel the cold of the floors. Nasty.

I used the wheelchair everywhere we went when we went out. It felt like the right thing to do. And I'm pretty sure if I hadn't, I wouldn't have made it around. As it was, I was pretty beat. When we got home from Ashkelon I had to just sit in the car for a while before I could make it into the house.

I have a new thing going, too. I've been walking into the walls. This in and of itself isn't that new - I have M.S., and I stagger a bit. Sometimes I stagger into walls. BUT, the new thing is that if I hit the wall just right, on my left side, I can't seem to push off of the wall. I'm stuck there unless someone gives me a hand. If I hit a wall on the right I'm okay, but twice (or three times?) I've hit the wall on the left and just couldn't push myself off of it. Weird.

I'm sure I didn't mention that John managed to get our teudot zehut (identity cards) changed to the new address at misrad hapnim (Interior ministry). This is great news because now we can start changing our address at places like B'tuach Leumi (that's like Social Security) and the sick fund we are members of (health insurance) and the banks and so forth and so on.

Something funny, I don't remember if I wrote it in a d-land diary when it happened, but I was thinking of it today. In the last ulpan I was in, the teacher wanted to know about our identity cards in the U.S. We had the hardest time convincing her that we don't have official identity cards in the states. We use our drivers' license, or state ID card, or a passport if we have one, but no official gub'ment issued id cards for everyone.

This was after going around the room and discussing what was in the identity cards and what they were called in Russia, Uzbekistan, Moldova, Rumania, France and one of the South American countries. Boy do I feel stupid but I can't remember if it was Brazil or Argentina or what? And we had some people from Colombia as well. And an Ethiopian. Hmmm... they all seemed to have those identity cards wherever they were from. Curious, no?

John asked today if Canadians have those kinds of official identity cards. I don't know, but would be curious to hear. I remember we had an Australian in the class, but he didn't take any part in the discussion, was probably working that evening.

If we get settled in here, ever, I want to see if I can try taking another ulpan again. My Hebrew is better than it was, and largely as a result of the second stab at ulpan. If I can just stick with one through the past tense and maybe getting some future tense I would be very happy. Okay, happier, anyway. My biggest problem has been that I can't understand when people speak Hebrew to me. I can put together sentences which work for most of the situations in which I know what is going on, but I really can't understand. Even when I know all the words and what they are probably saying. My brain just isn't processing that for some reason. I'm hoping it's not something insurmountable, anyway. I know lots of people now who have lived here for years, or even decades, and never mastered Hebrew. And they get by, certainly. But I just don't want to be one of them.

Well, I think the Hannukah candles have burned down. I was sitting up because I lit mine very late and of course don't want to go to bed leaving the candles to burn out by themselves. Even if the house is concrete, everything in it isn't.

I'm debating inside myself whether or not to turn the heater off. It doesn't benefit any of the bedrooms, but if people get up in the night, it might be nice to have a slightly less frigid house. I don't know. I surely don't want to pay for heating the house all night. I just can't tell you how awful the financial situation is, and how scary for the future (there is the distinct possibility of having more money taken in January and February, by our old landlord, who is really stealing from us. Robbing us blind in fact).

Oh, one brief thing. Apparently there is a fellow on the other side of the moshav who does chickens, factory farm style. It is possible Hans could get some work there. Manual labour minimum wage type stuff, but it would be better than sitting around the house and he would be earning something he could save for going back to the states, or maybe to help out here.

I'm worried for him. I want something to work out.

I'm off to bed then. Good night.

I'm listening to the wind from the heater (it really sounds like a large wind blowing), and my cats

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06