| - Profile -+- Notes -+-Archives-+- E-Mail -+-Diaryland-+- Fotolog -+- Latest - |
|
Honey is Sweet Heart pounding - 2007-03-20 I'm grateful for: staying present, not getting too crazy; an email from Hans; doing schoolwork with Eliyahu. I got an email from Hans tonight. It's short, and he asks me to read the longer letter he just sent - only I didn't get any other letter. I wrote back to him but I guess he'd already gotten off the computer wherever he is at. Now my heart is pounding, and I'm fretting and feel unable to go to bed. I'm not worried about him so much. I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. Things have actually been going quite well here, all things considered, and my life experience leads me to expect that if things are going well, it is only so that I will be that much more hurt when the shit hits the fan. This is not reality. I know it is not reality. But that's the way it feels inside. I'm working on it and at the same time trying not to go all nutty by denying it or trying to pretend that what is happening, isn't. That was a bad sentence and I just don't care. Things are going well in the house. I got all of Eliyahu's clothes out of his dresser and the dresser out of the boys' room. Tomorrow hopefully we can get it moved into the cottage for Havva. The floor is cleaner. Laundry got done. We took Eliyahu to be seen by a dermatologist and have new goop for the ringworm. Which is still hanging on. We got to the shuk. Havva got to meet with the woman at the library for an interview, which went pretty well. Havva isn't sure she wants the job, so there's no real pressure on this one. Some stuff showed up from Amazon.com. It had me freaking out for a bit because it was stuff I ordered like two days ago, and some other stuff I ordered six weeks ago hasn't come. But it turns out they shipped these packages from Germany. A couple of 'chicken books' for Eliyahu, two movies, and a season of In Living Color on dvd. Still waiting for that first order, which had all of my first choices in it. *sigh* I'm still feeling freaked out. And very tired. I hope the tired can override the heart-pounding. I need sleep. Today was such a good day. No reason tomorrow shouldn't also be good. I hate feeling this way. 0 bleats so far:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::
~~~Last Five Entries~~~ |
