I'm grateful for: D3 not having been injured even more; being able to shower and wash my hair, no small thing; S3 spending lots of time with other homeschooled friends.

I'm in so much pain.

It's been quite a while, and I was doing so well. It's not easy to accept this again.

I have an appointment to have my teeth cleaned at the dentist tomorrow. I *really* don't want to go. I don't want to go because just getting dressed hurts, sitting up hurts, how the hell am I going to go through all the steps of getting to the dentist's office, not to mention get through the cleaning (what will I do when they tell me to sit up and spit?), and get back home again. I'm frightened about the amount of pain. I don't know that I can take it - forget that, I KNOW I can't take it. I can take some of the valium that the dr. prescribed for me t take for dental work, but it seems wrong, since the pain I'd be taking it for isn't the dental work - and the valium doesn't actually do anything about the pain, it just distances me from it a bit 'cause I'm mentally out-to-lunch.

So, that was my day. Lots of pain. I managed to get up and shower and wash my hair. Yeaa! And I rested as much as I could. I reconciled a checking account and a credit card statement with my records. I even hoisted the hand weights a few times.

I got assaulted by telephone calls. MS phoned early this morning, so did a couple of people I can't remember now. I got called many times by TH, and D2. Long distance calls included one from a Caribbean island, D1, RS and um, there was another one, oh, yes, MMF. S1 got to work for a guy on the moshav, Yoni, who is bit of a putz. S2 worked for him while S1 was in the U.S. They didn't get along. Yoni didn't hesitate to bad-mouth S2 to S1 during the two hours they worked today. Of course we ALL know Yoni's opinion of S2 - Yoni has not been so blessed as to hear S2's opinion of him. I taught my children manners that he has never heard of.

I think he DID hear some of D3's opinion of him when she was working for his wife, babysitting the three children. She understandably didn't want him around when every time he came in he upset the children and by the time he left they were crying. He says awful things about his wife, also.

I don't know why I'm bothering to go on about this person - he does not elevate my conversation. I guess being in pain I crab, and he is someone easy to crab about.

D1 phoned to tell me the latest really awful things here mom and dad have done. I listened, sympathized, and was happy to get off the phone.

D3 is feeling much better. Still in really bad pain, but able to walk about the house and do more than whimper in pain. My phone call from the Caribbean island told me about her grandmother, who fell off her horse, and broke her back, and never walked again. And also about when she had fallen off her horse and broken her bac, - but by the grace of Gd she had a full recovery and can walk and has a full range of motion today. Both she and her grandmother were 30 when they had their falls. Anyway, it gave me a good boost of gratitude. It doesn't take away any of D3's pain, but I find it a bit easier to bear.

HER pain, not mine. Isn't it almost always easier to bear someone else's pain? Unless it is your children. Well, I am sitting propped up to write this, and the pain has gotten bad enough I'm feeling nauseous, so it's is time to lie down and rest, and try not to push myself. If possible.

I forgot to mention we have company. LS (friend from Petakh Tikvah) and her son 'Roo' (nickname). And D2 is here for a long weekend. Rather a full house.

I'm listening to The Kinks: In A Space

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06