I'm grateful for: a good week, despite being so sick; anti-biotics, don't live without them; my winter clothes.

I am/have been *so* sick. I just went to the dr. Dx: Bronchitis + something else. I have to go back for blood tests, tomorrow morning or Tuesday or Wednesday. Whenever I can get a tor - an appointment.

There've been so many things I wanted to write, to say, and I don't know if I even remember them. The kassams and mortars continue, a handful a day pretty much. I never have managed to write about it as I want to - I get so caught up in media bias and unfairness and all that stuff. That's not what I want to write about. I also am not writing about the bombs because I want to make people feel sorry or worry or give the impression that there is anything here that is, oh, I don't know, beyond the pale.

It *is* beyond the pale that they can launch up to forty missiles at us in one day, and we are considered to be in a state of 'cease fire.' However, if Israel attacks a couple of guys who are in the act of launching a missile, then we have broken the 'cease fire,' and we are the bad guys. I need to write that because it is true, but it's not what it is about for me. Not for anyone living here.

The truth is - truth - that we are in no more danger of being injured or killed than a person living in a city like New York, or Manchester (in England). We are significantly less likely to be injured or killed here than driving on the highways in the U.S. So are the soldiers in Iraq and Afghanistan, for what that is worth. We are people carrying on our lives, with certain given dangers that are somewhat different that most of the people I know, but still, no *greater* degree of danger.

I want to be able to write about some of the funny things that our particular dangers bring into our lives. I keep getting derailed into rants and the struggle not to complain about the constant barrage of lies and anti-semitic bias (they say anti-zionist), that is widely disseminated as 'news' and seemingly believed by so many of my friends and even family. When the bombs started falling again here, I spoke to my sister, and she said there was absolutely no news about it - none at all. A couple of days later there WAS an article about the 'resumption of violence' in Israel (she tells me). THAT was a report about the IDF taking out a missile launching platform and a couple of people who were working on it. So I'm not just whining out my paranoia. But, still. Everyone either already knows this, or just doesn't care. I don't like getting derailed into complaint and more ranting. I'm going to try not to. No promises. There.

So, anyway, funny things that come up as a result of living with the peculiar dangers in the Gaza belt...

About a week ago, we received a visit from a delegation of official types. They were going door-to-door to talk to people, make sure they have a plan for when the 'Tzeva Adom' warning goes. Ideally every home has a safe room that is reinforced against missile attacks. Right.

Fortunately, our local officials are realists. So, they start telling us where to go, what is the safest place if the alarm goes off, and we have about fifteen seconds to get to a safe place. Go to the east side of the house (Gaza is to our west). Sit down against an inside wall, not by a window. Under a concrete roof if possible. Our roofs, the roofs of every house on the moshav, are red ceramic tile, resting on extremely flimsy wood supports. So TH tells them "we figured we'd just go under the house."

Success!! They broke out into big grins, and gave us a refrigerator magnet. Does anyone remember those red circles they used to give out -at least when I was a kid - you'd put them in the window of a room that had children sleeping in it so that in case of fire they'd know where to look for how many children? It looks just like that. With, very officially the words 'under the house' written so we won't forget where our safe place is.

***

That's all I can remember right now. TH has gone to talk to a realtor in Sderot. We don't want to move to Sderot, we don't want to leave our little moshav here. But, our landlord is proving intractable and impossible. He's going to end up screwing it up for himself and his children at this rate, but there's nothing we can do about that.

There are houses for sale, or that might be for sale on this moshav. Some of them could be made to work for us. All of them are not being made available. Either they were inherited by the children of the original owners, and they children can't agree whether to sell, or what price to get, or won't even talk to each other. Or, the owner is in so much debt that he can't afford to sell the house (hanging on hoping prices will go up). Or, the house is too small and the owner won't agree to some kind of accomodation, or, ... There are open lots, building lots, all over the moshav. The head of the va'ad (local governing committee), refuses to sell one to us, saying they are for the 'children of the moshav.' That would be the children, or grandchildren, of the original moshavniks. Now I hugely approve of reserving space so that families can stay here, rather than being forced to move away because there is no room for the children's families when they grow up. But. There are open lots literally all over the moshav. Where are the children of the moshav? They are not here. They do not WANT to come back here. Some do, and for those there are houses aplenty, and building lots aplenty. So I understand, but at the same time, they want us to be moshav members, we want to be moshav members, why can't they sell us one so that our children can someday BE children of the moshav? *sigh*

So, we are house-hunting. Either we will find the perfect place for us (which is what we thought this was), or else the fact that we are seriously looking elsewhere means that someone here will shift a bit. If someone wants to sell to us, or if they (the people of the moshav) really want us to say, then they will find a way to hang on to us. I hope it goes that way but if not, then we are not just sitting here waiting against the hope that someday our landlord will see reason.

That is not how communities work outside of Israel, at least that I've ever seen or heard of. It's not how all communities work here. But there are many, many small yishuvim, kibbutzim and moshavim where you don't buy a house so much as marry into a family. Or buy into a family business. We've been led to believe, and in fact we can feel it, that we are wanted, and plenty of our neighbours would do just about anything to keep us around, since we want to stay. The rest is up to Hashem. We just keep doing the legwork.

Saturday was D3's 14th birthday. She had a couple of friends to sleep over for her birthday celebration, and she cleaned up. She got an iPod from my sister, dvd's and a map she wanted from my mother, books from me, books and a gift card from her siblings. She was gibbering and chattering gleefully last night, she couldn't control herself, she was so happy. I'm only sorry my sister couldn't also see it. She deserves some of the nachus.

Thursday was a sleepover for S3 at his friend Nadiv's, for his (Nadiv's) birthday. It was a full and busy week. Also our car failed to pass some sort of test, and we have a loaner car. A real blouze-mobile. It's got a huge trunk though. So there appears to be some good in all things.

I've run out of steam. I'm hoping for more good stuff to write the next time I can get here. I'm taking antibiotics now, but I don't feel better yet. Hopeful, though. Be well, all, and Gd bess.

I'm listening to Cavalcade of America: Quality of Courage (old time radio program)

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06