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Honey is Sweet Too tired to sleep - 2009-01-25 I'm grateful for: spending a happy day with my kids; reading with S3; visiting with D2; playing Sorcerer's Cave with all of them. I'm frantic, which is not good for getting to sleep, and since what I'm frantic about is that I need to get to sleep, this is absolutely not helping. I have to get up early tomorrow so D2 can practice giving me a massage. I know, don't you just feel sorry for me? It has to be quite early so I can drive her home and then to the clinic at her school, where she has an appointment before going to work in the afternoon. S1 and S2 are coming with me. S1 in order to be able to buy some books, S2 to get practice driving and to help driving home at the end of it if I am having trouble. D3 wanted to come, but she may have to work tomorrow. It's too bad, but then, work and making money is good. Today, well, I didn't sleep last night. I managed to have an okay day despite that, but not a restful or easy one. Talked with FB tonight and ended up rather upset with him honestly, but it's not his fault, RS said something off-the-wall nutty and I got included in it. Still, it's hard to have him acting as if I had behaved as she had. Long talk with RS tonight, and an abortive and difficult conversation with the father of my grandkids and his wife. I haven't been able to buy birthday presents for her kids because, guess what, there's been a war on here. It's like its completely news to them. Okay, it is irrelevant to them in their lives, fine, but then either I should be irrelevant or they should take an interest when it is something that major. I'm not asking them to get bent about my sciatica or something. Argh-argh-argh-argh-argh. I don't really care for either of them, but as long as they are family... I also answered an email from my still-son-in-law. At least legally, as a divorce hasn't been made. He sent me this cutesy email awhile back saying the only thing he had to offer was his heart and he was sending it to his dear friends. I couldn't figure out what to do with this at first. What I did today is to tell him thank you for the thought, and that I was rather angry with him about what went down with D1. I also acknowledge that I only have her side of the story, and I am willing to listen to his side - but, regardless, she is my daughter and my first loyalty is to her. I'm quite willing to be 'friends' if he wants. I'm not willing to piss off or brush off my daughter, especially since by all accounts what he did was really WAY beyond the line. I'm not getting any more calm, and I doubt that writing will help. I am going to read a couple of short pieces from the six day war. If that doesn't put me to sleep, I guess I'm doomed. I've been listening to Peggy Lee, but the song just ended and I can't remember it's title anyway. 0 bleats so far:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::
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