I'm grateful for: not taking drugs; a warm winter (compared to anywhere else I've ever lived); two hours of good talk w/RS - both of us hoping we'll still be able to do that when we live next door to each other (or, Hashem help us, in the same place).

Wow, I was in an amazingly foul mood for the last four days. I've no idea why, really. Just foul. I have no idea why today it seems to have left me, at least for the moment.

I did spend about two hours on the phone with RS, and a good chunk of that time spewing my guts - about FB, and D1, and a bit about D2's intended and the vile mother that comes with him, and well, just kind of spewing. I don't know that that has anything to do with the lessening of the foul mood. I honestly don't remember a mood that lasted as long as four whole days.

Of course, my memory is shot, so that is worth what it is worth.

I find myself wondering if maybe it has anything to do with the acupuncture - it's new, having someone actually identify a real problem I have and address it, might that have some connection to the horror that it's been to be me for a few days? I don't know if there is any way of knowing, but I may ask him when I go on Friday. Driving to Tel Aviv every Friday is quite a commitment. It's hard to imagine. Hopefully he will decide I don't need to go in every week soon. That would be good.

I've stopped taking all the medicine I have. All of it, even the thyroid replacement. I actually haven't noticed me being any worse, energy-wise or any other way, and in some ways I feel noticeably better.

At some point I will either have to start taking the thyroid stuff again or hear about if from the phalanx of dr.s, but for right now what they don't know won't hurt me. I am also not taking the anti-histamine, not taking the large and smooth muscle relaxants (that is two different things), not taking the valium prescribed for visits to dr.s and dentists that are too stressful. Although I expect I'll go back on that when I have to go in for yet another root canal with a new dr. I am NOT looking forward to that one.

I just feel more normal. I wonder how much that stuff was messing with me. Sometimes there is no way to know.

I'm up late again, right now it is 3:40am. I am okay with that for the moment. I really am powerless over my sleep/lack-of-sleep schedule, and better off not fretting about it. When possible.

I slept from around one until sometimes after four in the afternoon, after a somewhat hysterical morning. I was up all night last night, when I felt like I might have been able to sleep otherwise, opening doors for dogs and cats, and answering the upset 9yo (who had kicked his covers off). Then, when I was finally able to fall asleep around 5:30am, I ended up being woken up by barking and scratching dogs and cats because TH had taken S2 to his Hebrew test (passed, quite well, and happy about it), leaving S1 in charge, and S1 had just gone outside to work on the fence without first making sure that the animals were settled.

So that whole not being able to sleep thing from 9:30 on had me upset, and like I said ended up a bit hysterical. I phoned TH and he was his usual tower of strength so I hung up on him. Then TH phoned S1 and tried to 'fix' the problem by telling S1 to do something unhelpful and, well, it was a pretty horrible morning.

Around 4pm, when S2 woke me up to see if I wanted to feed the birds (which I did. I don't know if I would have made it out, but I would have wanted to try), I then found out that TH went ahead and fed them, too early yet, without even checking if I wanted to. I was livid. Added to irregularities in financial matters and him screwing up making the dog food, he's just been batting about 0 the last week or more. I am SO not happy with his shit.

So, anyway, that in a lop-sided messy kind of way was my day. That and a rocket attack, but it hit in a different region, lucky us. And not going to get our wholesale food order because (according to the boss) they forgot to load the order on the truck. Now I have to wait until Monday for some (to me) pretty important basics, like Vanilla extract and spaghetti.

At least it also puts off having to come up with the more than 2000 shekel to pay for it all. Eating is not cheap, not if you insist of food that has actual nutritional value. Yes, I know vanilla extract doesn't fit the bill, but most of what we are buying is stuff like 100% fruit juice, which you just can't buy in the stores here, no way, no how, and anything whole wheat.

I'm sure I could think of more stuff to write, and I seem to be a dab hand at finding stuff to complain about lately, but that is reason enough to stop now.

I'm listening to the Pointer Sisters: It's Raining Men

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06