I didn't sleep again last night. This is getting really old. I lay down and shut my eyes and lay there. I've no idea for how long. I finally fell asleep eventually, and woke around 10am. Which would be fine if I'd gotten eight or more hours of sleep but it wasn't even close. So - I'm grumpy and grouchy and generally out of sorts. Again.

Nothing in particular going on today. RS has been in the salon since sometime yesterday. She slept in a chair and as far as I know hasn't gotten up to go to the bathroom. Scary. It is possibly worth mentioning that one of the issues we've had with her is her, um, having accidents. The cushion on 'my' chair in the salon is now several shades of yellow cleaner than the arms or back. Now I have nothing against having a clean cushion (if only I could get TH to clean the arms and back thoroughly, too) -- but it illustrates the point without too much information, I hope.

Now I have bladder control problems myself. I have diapers, which I loathe, and which I use when necessary because - that's what you do. I have offered to give RS some on more than one occasion. I am really, really unwilling to put up with this sort of thing indefinitely, but I am almost equally unwilling to get into the morass of trying to 'explain' to my sister why what she does is unacceptable and what she could/should do else. You see, she has convinced herself that the way she is, what she does, is the *only* way it is possible to be. She's decided that 'this,' 'that' and 'the other' are all impossible, not to be thought of, and since she has no other choices clearly this is what Hashem wants.

I don't think so.

But I am SO not up to getting into it with her. I've had these conversations. She keeps asking 'why' and then arguing with whatever I say. If I do try to explain to her 'why' about anything, she will always find reasons and we end up instead arguing about something that had nothing to do with the point of the conversation. Instead, I say things like 'it just is.' Which isn't terribly helpful, but I truly am dealing with someone who in some ways is only a terribly advanced toddler. You don't try to explain 'why' to a toddler about many things, you just insist. Problem is, insisting with a 50yo toddler isn't quite the same. You can't sweep her off her feet, pull off her pants and put a diaper on her.

*sigh*

So - not to go on and on about RS (any more than I already have) I sent my credit card info to a travel agency that now is not replying to my emails or answering their phone. This has me *extremely* unhappy. I am not at the point of phoning my credit card company and denying any charges from the travel agent - there is the chance that she is doing what I want and is just very bad a customer service. But I am extremely unhappy. Unhappy also because in theory I have reservations for a hotel in less than three weeks, only I have no idea if I have the reservations, or how much it is going to cost me, or anything useful like that.

You know in another country (say, the U.S.) a travel agent that worked like this would be out of business, not to mention having legal troubles. But T.I.I. This is Israel. Odds are everything will be okay and everyone will wonder what I was fretting about. Everyone but me and anyone from a country where people actually take financial matters seriously. Sometimes living here is really brain-twisting.

I had a *very* good conversation with FB last night, late, we talked until after midnight. About RS a bit, but more about us. One really positive thing is that he is coming out here to visit right after RS leaves. He won't come, and I wouldn't ask him, while RS is here. Especially after her pernicious and vicious lie about us. But as soon as she is gone we will have a four day visit, and Please Gd let us not end up back in the old pattern of him taciturn and nasty and me getting angry and us fighting again? 'Cause we really do get along great most of the time. Just not when he is living in my home...

***

I started this 5.5 hours ago. Interruptions and life - I should've just sent it. Well, here goes--

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06