I'm grateful for further reductions in stress; old television programs available on the web; the hope of life being better when Neil is gone.

I'm up too late again, but tonight it doesn't feel so bad. I got some things resolved today for myself. And so I am sitting up because I want to write an entry here, and because I want to see a download finish, and knowing that I will probably wake up at the same time, regardless of what time I go to bed.

Friday I should sleep FINE.

As things stand now, tomorrow morning Havva goes to work around 7:30am. When she gets home, she and Neil and John are driving to Jerusalem. Hashem willing, while she is working John and Neil (with the help of Hand and/or Zechy I don't doubt, Neil is of absolutely no use in these things) will be loading the van with the stuff in Neil's room.

Things resolved include:

1. That nothing is coming back. John will drive Neil and stuff in to Jerusalem. Anything Neil can't get upstairs or whatever - not our problem. It's not coming back (and that includes Neil)

2. That this is the last trip we make to move his stuff. Anything doesn't fit in the van, or he can't manage to get it out the door, it is up to him to come up with movers or friends to come and get it. Not our problem.

3. That we will no longer subsidize his telephone use. We finally got detailed phone bills for the last three months. Two of the last three months Neil's phone use was almost 200 shekel. As compared to the rest of the family which uses around 300 shekel. For seven people with five phones. The third month Neil didn't have a phone because it was stolen. We will continue to pay for the purchase of the phone (something like 16 shekel a month for the next three years), but if he wants phone service, he'll have to go pay for it himself.

4. He is not coming back for shabbos, we are not offering any help at all (if he asks, it's a different story), nothing, absolutely nothing, is to be volunteered).

5. We are not giving him any money. There is this theory that we owe him about $1600 for money loaned to us about a year ago. Fine. If my mother drops dead or Hashem chooses to shower money on us, I'll probably give it to him just so my conscience is completely clear. But my conscience is clear. I have cooked for him, shopped for him, cleaned for him, put up with him, he's used my computers, my television, videos, dvds, furniture, books, washing machine, electricity, telephones, we've driven him all over the country, helped him get to Turkey, moved his stuff three times, including once in the famous lift debacle, which he paid not a penny for. He's broken things, and thrown things out that were not his. He's brought a wave of trouble (the cats didn't pee on anything they shouldn't before he moved in with us, curious, no?) that presumable isn't his fault, but that we didn't have before he came and are unlikely to have after he's gone. If that's not worth $1600 - he can sue me.

And, again, theoretically, tomorrow he is gone! I would be on my hands and knees ecstatic if I wasn't too sick for physical demonstrations. Yes, I'm still sick. And no one is as sick of it as I am.

I really am better though. I'm terrified of another relapse. I get better enough I fell like I can do things, and then I am so afraid that I will overdo it and cause another relapse. I can't stand the thought. And I can't just sit here doing nothing while the laundry piles up, the house goes to shit, and John works himself to the bone, literally, when I do have a bit of energy available. *sigh* Next week *should* be so much easier. Please, Hashem.

No word from the gov'ment on the returns. I know it's too early, but I can't help being impatient. Havva and Hans want to buy their plane tickets, and I have to have money to do it. I somehow don't think they will accept post-dated checks. ;-)

Ohboy, my download finished. A classic Star Trek episode, Space Seed. I'm excited by that, too. The kids have had plenty of experience with the ST movies, and later series starting from STTNG, but have seen almost none of the original series. I doubt it's worth it to get too many of them - it's a huge expense, and takes forever to download even one of them. But then, I don't suppose they need to see many of them to get the flavour and the gist. Enough to understand a lot of the Star Trek jokes. ;-)

We have the Trouble with Tribbles on videocassette. It's funny how things work out.

I've lost any thread of what I might have been writing, or intending to write. And the download is finished and it's after 1am. So, although I am not at all caught up, I'm going to bed.

It's been a very, very difficult couple of days, but mostly good. And John has been so good (for him) I have to worry about what happens when the rubber-band snaps back. Reaction. Still, I won't complain. It's such a huge change from his constant little abuses it's like night and day.

I'm listening to Star Trek: Space Seed on my computer.

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06