I'm grateful for: more room on my bed; possible progress with the current md; having had enough money to eat shawarma three times out this week.

I have friends who regularly ask me "How is the MS?"

I always respond "The MS is doing fine."

I mean, what?

I suppose once or twice it could be considered cute. Or funny or something. But it irks me. If you want to know how I am doing, or what's up with my constantly changing array of MS symptoms, can't you just ask? Why do we have to go through this cutesie little game which, believe me, is NOT funny. Not anymore. If it ever was.

One of these is Megret, my friend (or rather, one of them) with multiple personalities. She has a broken back, along with a host of other problems which just about boggle the mind. I doubt she would take it kindly, or respond in a joking fashion if I asked "How's the brain bleed?"

Another is a friend with Fibromyalgia. She would probably respond jokingly to "How is your Fibro," at least the first couple of times, but after that? Am I the only one who thinks these things go way past their expiration date?

I don't know why it is particularly irking me today. It just doesn't feel like a friendly thing to do - rather something people do that is supposed to look friendly but really isn't. If anyone knows what I mean. I am open to the idea that I am just being pissy today, but, well, I dunno. Every time Megret asks that question it floors me for a moment. I don't even know why - since she asks it most times that we talk.

***

Completely unrelated: Just a quick recap for anyone who cares and missed it while it was happening. I've always bled heavily every month. Heavily like no collection of diapers or even plastic pants can hold it all. Almost since I came to Israel I've been bleeding like that, but all the time. In the last ninety days, for instance, I've had about seven days with no bleeding.

The first OB/GYN I saw in Israel is the only one who has actually examined me while I was pouring out buckets of blood, and he sent me off immediately to hospital. Unfortunately there was another OB/GYN at the hospital who decided it wasn't that bad and sent me back home again. That's as close as I've come to any dr. really seeing what is going on.

I moved to another part of the country, the centre, and started with a new round of dr.s and neuros and OB's. Whee fun. After a year (during which he never examined me during a full bleed), I think the OB there was actually going to maybe, possibly, finally go through with the hysterectomy which he had told me was absolutely necessary the first visit, and he'd been dragging his feet on ever since.

To be completely honest, I was dragging my feet too. But if it really was as urgent as he led me to believe, there was no excuse for his foot dragging.

So now I am in yet another region of the country (the south) and starting over with still ANOTHER set of dr.s, neuros, a new OB (so far only one), and of course the acupuncturist and reflexologist. And so on. I have an advantage this time, in that I will walk into the OB's office saying I want you to do this hysterectomy already, instead of hoping there is some other option. Another advantage I hope is that he is the chief OB in the whole health plan.

I should mention that twice, due to the bleeding, I have become so anaemic that I probably should have been hospitalized. The first time, my dr., when he got the blood tests back, said he was amazed I could even sit up. The second time, (this was with the last OB) he talked about putting me in hospital for a transfusion, but like everything else he talked about, it never happened. Fortunately for me, I bounce back very well from this, and taking iron supplements and making sure I eat one meal with red meat a day has put me back in the pink, as it were.

So, that's the rough encapsulation of where I'm at and why I haven't yet had the operation, and all that sort of stuff. You know what? Forget all the other stuff. I am just damn tired of ruining my clothes all the time. And I can't buy decent underwear (at least that I like and feel comfortable in) in Israel. So that's a really good reason for why this has got to stop.

You just can't tell the damn dr.s that.

I"m listening to the Brith Milah Pageant from Kazablan.

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06