Havva's gone. She's left for her new job in the city. Maybe she'll come home for shabbos, maybe she won't. I burst into tears when she left. Again. If this is the last leaving then maybe I won't have to feel this way again?

I feel like maybe I didn't cling to her tightly enough. Which is silly.

It's bittersweet. I'm very happy for her, she was really ready to get out of her parent's home, and away from her siblings. Really ready to be living as a 'real' adult. Really, really ready to stop waiting for her life to get started.

She may even be back - although I hope not. If this job doesn't work out, she'll be coming home again, as it is a live-in situation. And the chief librarian in Netivot has made it clear she wants Havva back there, so it's not as if she would have nothing to come home to.

I didn't sleep last night. I started the night out with Balta (large Australian sheepdog) on my bed, not too long afterwards Eliyahu crawled into bed with me. With the two of them I couldn't get all of me on the bed. Sometime around 3am John got up to go to the loo, and I managed to get him to move things around and make some room for me. He ended up taking Balta out of the room with him, but then I discovered about Eliyahu's toenails. The need trimming. Well, I did finally fall asleep sometime before five. *sigh* I'm hoping to fall back asleep again for a while. I hate sleeping the day away, but a person has to sleep sometime.

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06