I'm grateful for: having had an evening of relative clarity; getting my bed back (tomorrow night); an amazing, wonderful collection of children.

Too much email, not enough brain.

My brief moment of relative clarity is over. Instead I am filled with fear (about what?) and anger. I've just reached the point in my book on spirituality in which is says that the cure for anger is emuna. Emuna is often translated as spirituality, but it's rather more than that. Not really explainable, not important for this diary, so 'spirituality' it is. Anyway, I had to put the book down just at that point, and I really want to read it. Must wait for another chance, whenever that may be. I've taken to bringing books with me when I go to the bathroom, because I am at least guaranteed not to be interrupted in there. Mostly.

So, anger and fear, and my head is feeling too full again. Too many emails that I don't really want to bother with, but can't bring myself to put in the trash. Maybe I'll get to the point that I can just throw it all away when it's not a blessing in my life. Maybe. Today, though, I'm going to finish up a couple of things and go to sleep. I won't be finishing anywhere near the stuff I've got piled up, but tomorrow is another day, and a day with two less children in the house. Hopefully that means I can get a moment or two during which I can hear what I am thinking. Not holding my breath, mind you, and still mostly waiting for RS to leave, but less bodies is a good thing.

I'll rattle on another time. G'night.

I'm listening to the fan on my air conditioner, and trying to listen through the mud in my head.

:: Yesterdays : Tomorrows ::

~~~Last Five Entries~~~
Hi and goodbye - 2010-10-15
I'll be moving on - 2010-10-10
Gold membership and stuff - 2010-10-10
Decisions, decisions - 2010-10-07
Days to go - 2010-10-06